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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27158149">He Knows</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/khxilyxxx/pseuds/khxilyxxx'>khxilyxxx</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Life with Derek</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, F/M, Step-siblings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 23:40:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,745</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27158149</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/khxilyxxx/pseuds/khxilyxxx</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek and Casey haven’t spoken in 7 years, but they meet once again at a bar where Casey’s friends are trying to hook her up with someone.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Casey McDonald/Derek Venturi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>95</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>He Knows</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A/N: I am aware that there is a new Life with Derek sequel show in the works, but this fic is ignoring its existence. Also, I choose to ignore that George and Nora had a kid together. Just an FYI. Just easier that way, for me. </p><p>Also pretend that this is a no-covid world that they are living in.</p><p>I had a dream about Dasey the other day and I just had to write a fic. Hello there to anyone still in this fandom! xoxo</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Haley:</span>
  <em>
    <span><br/>
</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Casey. Come out with us! It’ll be fun!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <b>Lindz:</b>
  <b><br/>
</b>
  <b>Not gonna happen Hale. The last time she came out was like… freshman year. And that was only because she was trying to impress us.</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Haley:</span>
  <em>
    <span><br/>
</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Pleeeeeease Caaaase.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Casey sighs, looking at her phone. She doesn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span> to go out. What’s the point? She’s aware her standards are pretty high. If they weren’t she’d be married already. She just wishes she knew what her standards </span>
  <em>
    <span>were</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It just seems that every man she meets fails some sort of internalized test that she doesn’t even know the questions to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But they’re right. It has been a while. Not as long as Linz said, but it had definitely been a few years. And maybe there’s a different crop of men to choose from. So she agrees to go with them. Nearing 30 years old, they aren’t really in the “go out every weekend” stage of their lives. Haley is actually married already and Linz is in a long-term relationship with her girlfriend. So Casey knows that this outing is really just an excuse for them to try to hook her up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She puts on a tight red dress, curls her hair in loose curls, does her make-up to impress. But her heart isn’t in it. Maybe she’s just meant to die alone, an old spinster with ten cats.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she hears the horn of Haley’s car sound, she puts on some strappy heels and heads out.</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“Open yourself up, Casey.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean? I’m open!” She argues.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Haley raises an eyebrow and gestures to Casey’s arms that are crossed over her chest. Casey huffs, letting her arms fall to her side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Linz comes back to their table with their drinks and hands them out. "Your seltzer m’lady.” She smirks, giving it to Haley.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Haley rolls her eyes, “Did you scope the place out?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes. A few potentials… there-” Linz flicks her head to the left of them where a group of three guys are huddled at the end of the bar. Casey takes them in, they’re cute… but… missing something. Haley looks at Casey for her reaction. Casey grimaces.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Linz nods, lowering her voice, “Then there’s him.” She tilts her head just slightly to the right and backwards. Casey looks over her shoulder to see a mess of reddish-brown curls. Her heart stops. She could only see the back of his head but it was unmistakably, regrettably </span>
  <em>
    <span>him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Her lack of response seemed to spur the girls on and as some other guy comes up to his right to talk to him, Haley gets a glimpse of his profile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Didn’t he go to Queens?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Casey feels her breath leave her body. This can’t be happening.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Linz turns to take another look at him. “Looks familiar. Maybe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I think he was the captain of the Gaels for a couple years.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then they’re all looking at him and Casey still hasn’t said a word, but someone scoots past him and he turns around to see and catches Casey’s glance. It’s only for a second, but it feels like an eternity and her cheeks are burning when he looks away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Linz turns back quickly, laughing. “Shit. Whoops.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Haley is elbowing her. “You </span>
  <em>
    <span>have</span>
  </em>
  <span> to go talk to him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Casey finally finds her voice, though she clears her throat first, “No- I mean. You said it yourself. Hockey. We’d have nothing in common.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Linz supplies, "No one’s saying you have to marry the guy.” She pauses, noting the pink of Casey’s cheeks, “Case. You’re blushing, and the dude looked at you all of one millisecond.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am not </span>
  <em>
    <span>blushing.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” But the blood rushing to her face betrays her even further.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m going over there.” Linz announces before turning on her boot-clad heel and walking over to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Casey is </span>
  <em>
    <span>mortified.</span>
  </em>
  <span> She gets up from her stool and runs after her but it’s too late. Linz taps him on the shoulder and gives a smooth, “Hey there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s not his type, but he still gives her a once-over and smirks, “Hey to you too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My fri-” Casey clears her throat, garnering the attention of them both.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lindsay, hey. I- uh- Haley needs- you at- over at the table.” Casey says, and his smirk grows wider, watching her flounder for words. Linz is confused, but seems to view this as Casey taking it upon herself to start a conversation with him, so she shrugs and walks back to the table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Casey.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And she can’t breathe again. She hasn’t seen him in… who knows how long (she knows, it’s been 6 years, 9 months, and 3 weeks). He looks different but the same. And he looks </span>
  <em>
    <span>at her</span>
  </em>
  <span> differently but also the same way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Derek.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The eyebrow raise, and the smirk, and she wants to punch him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who’s your friend?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah, she’s gonna punch him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A lesbian.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Both eyebrows go up at that point. “Hmm. I guess that checks out. Not married at 30, so you decide to switch teams?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She rolls her eyes. “As fun as this little reunion has been, I’m going to go back to my friends and pretend you don’t exist.” Casey turns to leave.</span>
</p><p><span>“You </span><em><span>are</span></em><span> a pro</span> <span>at that.” She stops in her tracks. He’s baiting her, she knows it. She takes a breath and keeps walking.</span></p><p>
  <span>“Nonono, you go back there right now!” Haley demands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s a jerk.” Casey explains, grabbing her drink and taking a large sip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Was he a jerk? Or was he just sexually interested in you, Case?” Linz asks. Casey scowls at her. “What?" Sometimes you have trouble deciphering the difference.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He did watch you walk away.” Haley points out and okay. That’s… information she didn’t need.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Casey folds her arms on the table and lays face-down onto them. Haley tries, “Come on, Case. You gotta get out there and have some fun.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But at what cost?” She whines.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey…” Linz says, softer. Casey lifts her head a bit to look at her. Linz is smiling at her, “Let’s take a shot, and get on that dance floor. You can stun all these fuckers with your rhythm and they’ll be falling all over you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And something in her, some primal desire, lifts her from her stool and heads to the bar for the aforementioned shots. The music is pounding and as the alcohol courses through her veins, she feels emboldened. The three of them get lost in the music, the bodies on the dance floor weaving in and out of each other. She’s not drunk, but her inhibitions are definitely falling to the wayside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a few songs, a hand snakes around her waist. When her head falls back against the person’s chest, she expects to see Linz or Haley. Instead she sees his familiar brown eyes. It’s not the first time they’ve danced with each other. It’s not even the first time they’ve been this close to one another, but something about it is different.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tries not to overthink it, just moves with the music. When he breathes, she feels his chest expand. His hand is gripping her waist at just the right pressure. She sees Haley in her peripheral and her wide-eyed glee is almost enough to take her out of the moment but this might be the only time she gets to enjoy this with him. So she shuts her eyes, and leans closer against him, wrapping an arm around his neck, hand nestling in his hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She can feel his breath on her neck, and it sends a shiver of delight down her spine. She can’t bring herself to face him, but just for these few minutes, she allows herself to feel him, to be close, to touch, to be touched. When the song shifts, the rhythm is stagnant but the variance brings her to reality. She slows her movements. His grip tightens on her waist. “Case.” He breathes. The music is loud, but his mouth is so close (too close) to her ear that she feels the vibrations of the word, rather than hears it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pulls away from him, turning to see the look in his eyes. She can’t read him, which seems impossible. She always can. But it has been seven years (6 years 9 months and 3 weeks). So who is she to say she can read him? She barely knows him, really. She thinks he looks disappointed, but he can’t be, shouldn’t be.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t say anything else and neither does he as she walks away. She keeps walking until she’s outside. It only takes Linz and Haley 30 seconds to find their way out as well and get to Casey, who is leaning against the brick of the building, eyes shut tight, hand on her chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You okay, Case?” Haley asks, and Linz rubs Casey’s shoulder soothingly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m fine. I just- I needed some air.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you wanna talk about it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“About what?” Casey asks, because what is there to talk about? They won’t ever understand the scope of how badly she just monumentally screwed up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean… how seriously into each other you and that dude are?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Honestly, I thought I’d have to hose the two of you down.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I would not like to talk about it. What I would </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>like is to go back three hours in time, politely decline your offer to go out, put my pajamas on and watch grey’s anatomy for the 20th time like I normally do on a Friday night.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are just a barrel of fun, aren’t you?” And he’s back. Her head falls back against the brick, knocking it just enough to ground her, not enough to hurt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Would you just leave me alone?” She whines, and her heart isn’t in it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that really what you want?” And he already knows the answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looks at him. “Stop it. I don’t know what- what you think is going to happen here, but-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine.” His jaw is set. Maybe it’s anger…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looks like he’s going to say something else, but he just turns, shows his stamp to the bouncer and goes back into the bar. She watches the whole thing, and there’s a part of her that wants to follow him, flow with the music again and get lost in him, just for tonight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Haley must notice the forlorn look on her face, “Let's… let’s get you home, Case.”</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>
    <span>So… are we gonna talk about last night?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>No.</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>You knew each other, didn’t you?</b>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t answer. She doesn’t have it in her right now.</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>There’s a knock on her door, she expects Linz. She’s the type to not let things fester. She goes to couples’ therapy with her girlfriend Erin even though they were already the most functional and healthy couple to begin with. She’s always saying “We need to address our feelings as they come up.” and it’s just… exhausting. After running from her feelings for over a decade, she’s thinks she has that whole process under control, thank you very much.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it’s not Linz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Got your address from George.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pinches the bridge of her nose. She might kill George, and then this whole issue will be moot. Because then they’d no longer be step-siblings. So there’s that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kinda sad, if you think about it, </span>
  <em>
    <span>sis.</span>
  </em>
  <span>"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She takes a deep breath, fire in her eyes. “If I wanted you to know where I live, I would have told you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> gonna keep going with this ‘I hate Derek’ schtick?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, it is sincerely </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> a schtick.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your hips say otherwise, Case.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And she wants to say her hips are dirty </span>
  <em>
    <span>liars</span>
  </em>
  <span>. But that’s really lame and Derek would never let her live it down (let’s not forget it’s also, of course, untrue), “Why are you here, Derek?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not even gonna invite me in?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighs but steps aside for him to enter. He looks around her living room. She notices him eyeing her pictures. She has pictures of Nora &amp; George. Lizzie. Marti. Edwin. Of Emily, of Haley and her husband, of Linz and Erin. But none of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were always quite the decorator. Take after Nora that way.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can you just get to it, Derek?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He sits on the couch, making himself at home in a ways that makes her furious. “No pleasantries?” He puts a foot on the coffee table. She raises her eyebrow at it and he puts it back down on the floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay then. Let’s start with, what the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Casey?” He lets out a laugh but it’s not funny and the laugh seems to know that too. She looks at the floor, hoping that it would open up and swallow her into it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seven </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking </span>
  </em>
  <span>years. You sure have gone to a lot of trouble just to cut me out of your life.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s pictured this moment a thousand times. She didn’t know it would hurt this badly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you want me to say?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He laughs. “God. You really - you hate me that much? Won’t even give me a proper explanation?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Things change. People grow apart.” She lies. He stands up, and they’re close (too close).</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No. What you did was purposeful.” He takes a step toward her, “And I know I can be a piece of shit sometimes, but I thought-” He searches her eyes, for what? She looks away. He’s right, but she can’t admit it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ve always hated each other, Derek. Why should we put the family through our fighting? It was easier to-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, that’s just it isn’t it. It was easy. Easy for you to just-” He takes a breath, shakes his head. Why is he even this angry? “We don’t fucking hate each other, Casey.” He’s looking at the wall of photos, “I don’t hate you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t hate you either.” It’s small. So small, she hopes he doesn’t hear it, but he does.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looks at her. Even though he seemingly knows this is true, it looks like her admission just saved his life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s- that’s why I had to. Do what I did.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ve avoided me at all costs because you </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> hate me?” He looks confused, but why? He </span>
  <em>
    <span>knows</span>
  </em>
  <span> already. They’ve both known it. For years. But admitting it… giving it breath and letting it sit out in the open between them… that’s a whole other beast.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You should go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck that. We’re finally getting somewhere. I haven’t seen you in 7 years and then- then we meet at a club we fucking dance together like </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> and-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was drunk.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Buzzed, maybe. Come on, Case. You were always a terrible liar.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We can’t do this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do </span>
  <em>
    <span>what</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” And why is he making her say it. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>knows</span>
  </em>
  <span> what.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> what.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Say it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You should go.” She tries again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not leaving until you fucking say it, Casey. Tell me the real reason you want me to leave, and I’ll go, if that’s what you really want.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t know when she started crying. It’s a silent cry. The tears just well up and slide down her cheeks. He’s still close and he’s still staring at her and she can’t take it. She shuts her eyes, tears getting caught in her eyelashes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He reaches a hand to her face and thumbs away some of the tears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It spills from her mouth, and his thumb moves from her cheek to her lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want me to leave?” He asks, simply, patiently, and it’s so unlike Derek, but so like him. In his moments of softness, of kindness.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shakes her head, opening her eyes. He’s staring back at her, eyes her lips momentarily. It’s a question, she knows, and she nods minutely before he leans in and captures her lips with his own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s everything. All of their pent-up aggression and rage towards one another, all of their love, all of their desire. It’s in this kiss. It’s in their hands as they hold each other. Finding balance within one another. They breathe and kiss and bite, and gasp and they move together. And he returns the </span>
  <em>
    <span>I love you</span>
  </em>
  <span> into her skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It ends with them on the floor, like many other times in the past, their bodies tangled together, just with less clothing than normal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do we- what do we tell them?” She asks, when it’s over.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Casey, they already know.”</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
</body>
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